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Confessions of a Shopaholic. Book shopping. S…

8 July 2003

Confessions of a Shopaholic.

Book shopping. So I just placed an order off Amazon.co.uk. Yes, ordered books not available here in the U.S. This is the first time I’ve done it, and I’m sure it won’t be my last. I can’t wait to get them! Especially since they’re coming from London, my second home! I get giddy when I buy books, I get all excited when I go inside a bookstore. I luurve browsing through bookstores and looking at all the new books, old books, all the displays, you name it. I can easily spend $100+ flat if I don’t control myself. I also like going to the library and browsing away! (Though it’s not quite the same as owning it). At this point, I can’t really afford to keep buying books (no money and no storage space), so I really try to dissuade myself from buying them. Lately, I’ve resorted to hitting me mates up for my Amazon wish list! Yes, I have no shame. Hahah…. I wouldn’t mind spending money here and there on books, but alas, I’m also a shopaholic for other items…namely clothes, shoes, and purses. Bloody triple-threat! I’m hopeless!!

Home shopping. Buying a house versus buying smaller items (like a pair of shoes for instance) are totally different things. For the latter, I get a nice, satisfying, “Cool, I can’t wait to wear these and show them off” –kind of feeling. For the former, however, I get quite worried, anxious, and get that “What the hell have I gotten myself into”–kind of feeling. Well to be fair, I also get that anxious feeling when I see my credit card bill, but the anxiety about home-buying is slightly more overwhelming. We’re supposed to close on the home tomorrow. I pray everything will go well. I just got the bill for the closing costs and let me just say, it’s a killer. We’re talking haute couture clothing prices here! But no, of course the costs won’t end there. Then home improvements costs come in. We’ll be doing the improvements in installments to help ease the costs….but costs are costs regardless!

Baby browsing. One of our friends is expecting their second child. She’s about my age. I’m like, “Whoa! So soon?” I feel like before I have a baby, I should be more “settled down.” In my definition, that means having a home, a good job where I’ve had at least 1 year experience, no major debts, and be at least 28 years old. (Granted, there are many folks out who are a lot less financially/socially stable and ready who do have children and are quite content. I wholly commend you!) At this point, I feel very much carefree still and not at all “grown-up.” Kinda like a kid, but a lot more responsible. But I would like to be mom very soon. I’ve always loved kids and always loved taking care of them. I baby-sat my brother Mikey. I was 15 years old when he was born. And I definitely pitched in to help out. Woke up in the middle of the night for him, changed him, fed him, bathed him. The whole-nine. I also did the same for a second-cousin of mine named Alan. They used to drop him off at our apartment and I would baby-sit him for free. I don’t think I was even 13 yrs old yet, and Alan was about a year old. I also babysat for a lot of different kids over the years. (When you have 2 younger brothers, baby-sitting in inevitable). I think some of my friends (and maybe even the hubs) may think I’m not quite ready to have a baby because I exhibited such “carefree tendencies” like impulse shopping, going out and traveling, etc. But I know I’m more than capable. I just feel like I should enjoy being just the two us for now. And be a lot more ready.

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